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We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Samples From the Nostalgia Machine

by The (John) Candy

supported by
brandon moran
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brandon moran NICE FUCKING MODEL!!! Favorite track: The BioExorcist.
Maxrock
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Maxrock Not Djentle on the ears and not serious. This fucking rocks. Favorite track: Girl, You Know it's Korn Squeaky.
Croft
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Croft Never trust the living. Favorite track: The BioExorcist.
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1.
Mary! I love you! Susan! I love you! Girl! So what are you doing back? I thought back and thought about the things we used to do It really meant a lot to me Finally in a resting place You are Swedish base to my ace Encircled by your rad airspace Sexy crash for which I must brace Don’t stop to pump the bass Ensnared by my hands to your face Computer database Parallel interface You really mean a lot to me I really mean that much to you? You really mean a lot to me Now I’m dating Kathy Bates Caught up in dire straits Challenging the myth of fates Synced via lip in these United States Can a guy get a break in these United States? Can the boys get a break in these United States? Pilatus Morvan
2.
Guide me to the one At the center, I am the sun Guide me to the one Severe lack of fun Cooked me so well that I’m overdone Severe lack of fun Eyes of glass will stun Even with daggers you are undone Eyes of glass will stun Olivia Munn Play on words, call it a pun Olivia Munn We are the ones who conquer Hit me, vicious slaughter We are the ones who conquer Hit me We are never We are ever Tootsie overrun Battle axe has me undone Tootsie overrun Eyes peeled, bombing run Wheels turn for the spell that you’ve spun Eyes peeled, bombing run We are the ones who conquer Hit me, vicious slaughter We are the ones who conquer Hit me We are never We are ever Burn
3.
Worming - I’m back again Shrunken head guy follows no trend Tim Burton, back at it again Festering with mouth sores Mi mi amor - a jazzy tuned score Settled in, sparkling rose adored Forged in manic fire Bluest blue and yellow conspire So much for truth, ghostly liar Never trust the living Never Trust the Living Never trust the living Never Trust the Living Don't mind her, she's still upset Because somebody dropped a House right on her sister’s head Oh, how convenient, it’s house dropping season It’s almost as if we don’t have a ceiling Unworthy of any giving, call it a Dead Man’s misgiving Try to make a living at the Dead Man’s misgiven Thanksgiving Dig in, dig in, dig in Dig in, dig in, dig in Ah. Well... I attended Juilliard... I'm a graduate of the Harvard business school. I travel quite extensively. I lived through the Black Plague and had a pretty good time during that I've seen the EXORCIST ABOUT A HUNDRED AND SIXTY-SEVEN TIMES, AND IT KEEPS GETTING FUNNIER EVERY SINGLE TIME I SEE IT NOT TO MENTION THE FACT THAT YOU'RE TALKING TO A DEAD GUY NOW WHAT DO YOU THINK You think I'm qualified
4.
Glenn Gulia is such a dick, stupid little dance of an arrogant prick Getting punched in the nose, in your business it will go Robbie Hart Robbed from the start Robbie Hart Robbing your heart Best man Better man Best men Better men Julia Gulia, makin sexy moves on ya Meatballs are in the hands of grandma’s best friend Dude looks like a lady Forbidden love I’m sunny, you’re shady Do you really wanna hurt me? Do you really wanna make me cry? Robbie Hart Robbing your heart Robbie Hart
5.
Ecto Cooler 04:14
Egon Peter Winston Ray Egon Peter Winston Ray Egon Peter Winston Ray Causing mayhem in my brain stem Marshmallow man’s in AMPM Causing mayhem In my brain stem Gotta stay puffed when days get rough Stay Shia as you get Labeouf’d Every time I see you in tight suede Can’t help but think you are self-made Every time you echo centigrade Can’t help but think how Ecto’s made Gathering in a quiet death bed Gathering in a quiet death bed Gathering in a quiet death bed Gathering Causing mayhem in the streets of New York The devil’s children - tips of his pitchfork Causing mayhem Streets of New York Every time I see you in tight suede Can’t help but think how Ecto’s made Slimer is my son Slimer is my son Slimer is my son Slimer is my son Two in the box, ready to go, we be fast and they be slow We be fast They be slow Ready here we go

credits

released February 24, 2021

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The (John) Candy California

The (John) Candy has been described as many things...a nostalgia machine, an embarrassment, sample-core, nostalgia-core, and tribute-core.

All music is sampled from other hardcore/metal/djent/metalcore/etc. acts, woven into a nostalgic tapestry of movie quotes, and most recently, pop music of the era. The band has self-produced and released four additional EPs, one single, and two full lengths.
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